Depending on where your internet searches take you, one might be led to believe that Tupac is still alive or that the world is secretly being ruled by “lizard people”. (Aba ayaw mo maniwalang may naniniwala sa ganun? Sige click mo yung link.) But if one of the rumors floating around the web is to be believed, then we might be looking at the last 16 episodes of Game of Thrones. In fact, we might even be looking at an abbreviated season next year. One of the directors of Game of Thrones, yung nag direct nung “Hold the Door” episode, all but confirmed this in an interview. (So hindi pa sapat na pinakain niya si Hodor sa mga zombies kailangan saktan pa niya tayo ng ganito ano? Sadista tong lokong to e.) As sad as that news might be to most Game of Thrones fans like myself, sa totoo lang hindi pa ba natin inexpect to? Storywise, it actually feels like we’re closer to the end than the beginning. Ilang beses mo pa bang puwedeng ipakasal si Sansa sa pinaka-gagong lalaki sa show? Ilang beses mo pa bang kikidnapin si Daenerys bago ka matututo na hindi nga siya nasusunog at wala nga siyang pakialam kahit makita mo siyang nakahubad!

This season is also drawing to a close and the revelations and plot twists just keeps on coming and coming. But before we get to that, let me remind you guys once again that spoilers are coming so do not proceed if you haven’t seen the latest episode. Turn around and do your “walk of atonement” before it’s too late.

You’re still here? Good. Let’s begin.

Lagot ka, Arya. Wag ka magpapakita kay the Hound.

Can’t teach an old dog new tricks.

Usually a GoT episode starts with the HBO logo and the show’s theme song. But this week’s episode opens with its big reveal.  The Hound is back! Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the scar-faced giant with a mean streak and a sensitive side is alive! Last time we saw the Hound was in the finale of Season 4. He’s mortally wounded after a fight with Brienne and Arya leaves him for dead. Hindi pa pinakita agad yung mukha e pinakita lang na may malaking lalaki na nagbibitbit ng troso na pang apat na tao. Sa maikling oras na yun inisip ko sino ba sa mundo ng Game of Thrones ang ganun kalakas para makapagbuhat ng troso mag-isa? The Mountain? Imposible nasa King’s Landing yun e. Hodor? OMG, buhay si Hodor??? And then the Hound finally turns around with his disfigured mug. I don’t know about you guys but before he “died” the Hound was starting to become one of my favorite characters on the show. Sure, kumag siya madalas but wouldn’t you be kung ganyan nangyari sa mukha mo dahil sa kapatid mo na kahit malaking tao ka na nga e nabubully ka pa kasi mas malaki pa siya lalo sayo? People actually call you “The Hound” for crying out loud paano kang hindi mananakit ng tao niyan?!

So apparently, Brother Ray, a septon played by Ian McShane (who happens to be one of my favorite actors in the world) found the Hound with his wounds rotting and his bone sticking out of his flesh. He nursed him back to health and now the Hound is part of Brother Ray’s community. But unlike the High Sparrow who’s an asshole, medyo cool tong si Brother Ray. Wala siyang pinapaniwalaang religion, alam niya lang na may higher power kung sino man yun. He swears, he drinks, siguro nagyoyosi rin. So basically kung nasa mundo ako ng Game of Thrones malamang dito ako sa kultong to sumali. At malamang kasama ako dun sa mga namatay sa dulo dahil inubos ng mga masasamang loob yung community ni Brother Ray at binitay siya sa simbahan na tinatayo niya. Just when you thought magbabagong buhay na si the Hound, the world reminds him that it’s still filled with assholes whose lives need to be ended. The episode ends with the Hound holding an axe in his hand and with murder in his eyes. I don’t know what role he’ll play in the bigger scheme of things but I do feel sorry for those bastards he’s about to massacre in the next episode. You just know it’s coming.

Girl just can’t catch a break. Bakit ba galit na galit sa kanya yung babaeng puro kanto ang mukha?

The girl with no name and no friends.

The last time we saw Arya, she was on the run once again. She didn’t proceed with the mission that Jaqen H’ghar gave her so the other girl with the weird hairdo is now out to kill her. But we now see Arya with an air of confidence about her, as if her life isn’t in trouble even though we all know that it is. Kaya nga niya kinuha yung sword niya na binaon niya nung unang dating niya sa Braavos di ba? She knows she screwed up. Anyway, habang naglalakad lakad sa palengke she overhears a Westerosi and books her passage across the narrow sea. So they come to an accord and feeling confident about herself she stops to admire the beautiful Braavosi/Braavosian sunset. She’s suddenly attacked by an old woman who happens to be the young Tilda Swinton with a bad haircut in disguise. She slices her across the chest and stabs her in a manner reminiscent of the Red Wedding. Tilda Swinton Jr. even twists the blade! (Ang bitch di ba? Akala ko ba sabi ni Jaqen “don’t let her suffer”???)

Arya somehow manages to escape the attack but is now wandering the streets of Braavos bleeding to death while the people look on with apathy. Pero eto naman kasing si Arya medyo tatanga tanga e. Alam mong yung kinalaban mo mga assassins with the ability to disguise themselves as anyone, pero chill na chill ka pang namamasyal para ka lang nasa Farmers. Ngumingiti ka pa sa bawat taong bumati sayo. Dapat lahat pinaghihinalaan mo e! Maski lola pa yan pag masama makatingin sayo dapat ready kang i-chokeslam! Kung ako yan nung hapon pa lang na sumablay ako sa mission ko umalis na ko e. But I have to admit this scene caught me by surprise. I always thought that Arya was one of the “safe” characters in the show. I just don’t see her dying anytime soon. And I still think she won’t. Pero saan kaya siya pupunta ngayon? My guess is she’s going to the actress. It’s not as if she knows any other person in the city, right? But we’ll see.


And the Academy Award goes to… Margaery.

Last week, in a shocking turn of events we saw Tommen and Margaery align themselves with the High Sparrow, thwarting the rescue attempt of the combined forces of the incest twins and the Tyrells. Since then, we’ve been wondering if Margaery really did have a change of heart or is this all for show. Well we finally got our answer this week. Apparently, she just knows how to say the right things because she’s got everyone convinced, even her own grandmother, that she’s turned over a new leaf. In one of the High Sparrow’s visitations, kinausap niya si Margaery na i-convince yung lola niya na mag repent na rin. Also, cinonvince rin niya na gampanan ang pagiging asawa kay Tommen kasi apparently nagkukwento ng sex life si Tommen kay High Sparrow dahil kung virgin ka and you’ve had a taste of sex for the first time you just have to tell everyone about it.

So while talking to her grandmother, Margaery slips her a drawing of a rose which is the sigil of House Tyrell, as if to say na her loyalty still lies with her house. But Margaery is playing a dangerous game kasi laging may nakabuntot sa kanya. She plays the game as well as anybody but how long before they see her for what she truly is?

The look of someone who wants to strangle an old lady so badly.

Olenna – 1, Cersei – 0

In a scene that can match the cattiness of local telenovelas, Cersei and Olenna finally have their confrontation. Parang nagharap si Cherie Gil tsaka si Celia Rodriguez! But actually, medyo mismatch e. Olenna went all out on Cersei, calling her the worst person she’s ever met and that’s not even the worst thing she said about her. After her walk of atonement, Cersei has become a character that deserves even a little of our sympathy but Olenna reminds us that all this trouble with the High Sparrow is Cersei’s fault to begin with. And Cersei can do nothing about it because Olenna’s right. Wala siyang magawa kung hindi mag ngitngit. I half expected her to order the Mountain to brutally murder Olenna but I guess even for a show like Game of Thrones that’s just a bit too much.

Or is it? Do you think Cersei will take this sitting down? Why do I get the feeling na bumebwelo lang si Cersei bago umatake? She’s been uncharacteristically docile this season. Wala pa siyang ginagawang major e. But is docile the word? Or calculated? I don’t expect her to go out quietly into the night.

Iniinggit mo pa si Theon alam mong kulang kulang na yung parts niya e. Wag ganun, ate.

Sucks to be you, Theon.

In a world where sex is a major currency, it really sucks to be Theon Greyjoy. It’s bad enough na pinutulan ka ni Ramsay Bolton ng “Theon Junior” mo pero to be stuck in a brothel with naked women all around and you can’t do anything about it? And this guy used to be such a sexual fiend! Para kang nagpakawala ng alcoholic sa factory ng Tanduay pero sinabi mong hindi siya puwedeng uminom. Mas nakakapang chicks pa ngayon yung kapatid niyang babae kesa sa kanya e! That must really hurt for Theon Greyjoy.

But at least he seems to be coming out of his rut and getting his balls back. (Figuratively speaking of course.) Ang kailangan lang pala e lasingin siya ni Yara Greyjoy para mahanap niya ulit yung pagkalalaki niya e. So now the “almost incest” siblings are going to Mereen to offer their ships and services to Daenerys. That’s not a bad plan at all because that’s exactly what Daenerys needs right now to complete her army. Sounds good on paper, right? But will this alliance actually happen? Will Euron Greyjoy be able to stop it? Hopefully, we’ll know in the next 3 episodes para malaman na natin kung makakatawid na si Daenerys. Ang tagal na niyang plano na yan hindi matuloy tuloy e. Kumbaga sa stoplight tuwing akala mo aabot ka na sa greenlight at makakatawid ka na sa intersection lagi kang nabibitin kasi yung tao sa harapan mo hindi umaandar dahil naglalaro ng Clash of Clans.


If Jaime dies, we riot. If Bronn dies, mag rarally ako sa EDSA shrine mag-isa.

Viva Le Bronn!

I have nothing much to say about the Jaime-Blackfish confrontation aside from the fact that Bronn, one of my favorite characters on the show, is also back. This season has been great, but what it lacks is Bronn. More Bronn is always good. Kung nilagay mo si Bronn sa Walking Dead, that would make the show 17 times more interesting. He’s witty, he’s frank, he’s pragmatic. He’s not a major character but in the world of Game of Thrones, it’s people like Bronn who survives. Hindi lahat sa Game of Thrones puwedeng barahin si Jaime Lannister and not get smacked on the face. Bronn has that luxury because he’s Bronn.

So the Jaime-Blackfish parley happened and apparently it was the first time that the two of them met each other. Siyempre walang nangyari kasi hindi sumuko si Blackfish. You have to hand it to the man. Tinatakot siya na papatayin yung nephew niya na si Edmure Tully and the guy didn’t even flinch. Either talagang tigas tong si Blackfish or bwisit lang siya sa pamangkin niya. Sorry to break it to you, Edmure, but it seems like your uncle isn’t too fond of you.

People I want to see Lady Mormont have a confrontation with: Cersei, Olenna, Littlefinger, Tyrion, Cherie Gil. My money is on the little girl.

The baby is now a lady.

Okay guys, a show of hands, who thought that Lady Mormont was such a badass? Itaas mo yang kamay mo kung ayaw mong ipahiya ka ni Lady Mormont ah, itaas mo yan! Grabe tong batang to! I’ve seen Jon Snow have an easier time with wildlings and white walkers than he did when talking to this young girl who Stannis once brushed off as “a wretched girl” and “a child of 10”. Seryoso bang 10 years old lang to??? E ngayon palang nangangarap na ko ng Lady Mormont-Olenna Tyrell confrontation e! Magtarayan lang sila ng isang buong episode tingnan natin kung sinong unang iiyak. Ser Davos was able to appeal to her gentler nature eventually but Ser Davos has always had a way with children. So kung may naghahanap ng yayo o babysitter sa Game of Thrones, Ser Davos is your man.

But Lady Mormont only has 62 warriors to offer! What good will that do exactly? Especially when the rest of the North seems to be turning their backs on Jon and Sansa. And it doesn’t help that their army is mostly composed of wildlings, a group of people that the North has vilified since forever. That’s why Sansa at the end of that sequence took it upon herself to send a raven to someone to ask for help. And that someone more than likely is none other than the sleaziest character in all of Westeros, Petyr Baelish. But what if Jon finds out about this “betrayal”? How will this affect their dynamic moving forward? Nagyakapan pa sila nung nagkita sila tapos mag-aaway rin sila soon after?

But if there’s one thing that this episode has taught us, it’s this: If you didn’t see someone die onscreen, then don’t assume that he/she is really dead. We’ve seen it before with Benjen Stark and now the Hound. Actually even if you see someone die, you can’t be too sure that they’re really dead. Tingnan mo nga si Jon Snow malamig na bangkay na nabuhay pa. Tingnan mo si the Mountain. Did we really see Hodor die? No, we just saw him being bitten by zombies. So there’s still a chance that there’s a Hodor zombie lurking out there. Can you imagine how cool that would be? Giant na zombie?! Where have you seen anything like that in all of film and television? Wala pa! How about Stannis? Did we really see him die? It’s unlikely that Brienne spared his life knowing how much she hates him, but who knows right?

Pero eto malamang nalunod na to.

Kapit lang, Gendry! Kapit lang! Mauubusan rin sila ng characters na ibabalik so baka sa susunod ikaw na! Uunahin lang muna nila yung mga mas importante siyempre. So baka season 15 makabalik ka na.


7.5/10. I liked the storyline of the Hound and Brother Ray. While nothing major happened this week, it was an episode that was needed to keep the plot moving and to prepare us for bigger things in the coming episodes. I would have given it a lower score pero takot akong mabara ni Lady Mormont e.


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